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TUESDAY
MARCH 31.1998
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mrohnian
Stadium collapses, investigation begins
Pirates plan to play
football opener at Rose
High School
Jomama Smith
U.S. PRESIDENT
Just as the contractors were putting
the finishing touches on the upper
deck of Dowdy-Ficklen Stadium,
ECU's world of football came
crashing to the ground in what has
become ECU's biggest tragedy of
ail time.
At approximately 1:30 a.m. this
morning, the recently completed
upper deck of the football stadium
started to crumble. Within seconds,
it lay on the ground in millions of
pieces. ,
First to report to the scene was
officer Jimmy Bubble of the
Greenville Police Department.
According to Bubble, the cause of
the incident is unknown at this
time, and investigation is currently
under way.
It is really unfortunate that this
has happened Bubble said.
"After all of the time and effort that
was put in to building the upper
deck, it will be hard to ever watch
an ECU football game ever again
At this time, plans are being
made for the Pirates' season open-
er against UT Chattanooga to be
held at Greenville's Rose High
School.
"We understand that it will be
hard to fit all of the ECU fans on to
Rose's school grounds ? much less
into the actual stands, but it is the
only option that we have at this
point Bubble said. "It is either
Rose or no ECU football games at
all in 1998
Faculty and staff at Rose High
School are delighted that the
Pirates will be playing on their
grounds, and will make every effort
to ensure that- things run smoothly
for the first game of the season.
"We are planning to have a
bake sale as a fund raiser for
rebuilding the upper deck
Joannie Jackal, a math teacher at
Rose said. "We will also be selling
Rose High School underwear for
$2.50 per pair. Be sure to get yours
In the early morning hours of March 31 many students and nearby residents heard the loud crash as the stadium crumbled to the
ground. The opening season will temporarily be played at Rose High School.
PHOTO By PROOUCTIO SPICE
before they all sell out
Tickets for the game will go on
sale on August 14, approximately
one month before the game date,
and can be purchased through the
Forensics Department at Rose
High School. Be prepared to wait
in line.
SGA President Scott Forbes Prostitution legalized
caught in nude at Rec Center
Incident not Forbes'
first offense
Olive Oyl
CHIEF or SPINACH
SGA President Scott Forbes made
a huge splash at the student rec
center late Monday night Forbes,
who was apparently skinny dip-
ping, said he has no intentions of
resigning.
"There's nothing wrong with
getting a little crazy every now and
then a defiant Forbes said. "PI!
do anything to make headlines
ECU police say they answered
an anonymous call at 2:13 a.m. say-
ing that someone had removed the
cover from the student rec center's
outdoor pool. When police arrived
they found Forbes trying to climb
over the fence with his clothes in
his hand.
"He was attempting to climb
over the metal fence surrounding
the pool when we arrived on the
scene officer Joe Grishom said.
"It was quite a sight We could see
his bare butt shining from the
police car
Forbes was taken to the police
station and released. He faces a
court date of May 7 and a campus
hearing is expected in several
weeks.
Police say an unidentified
female was observed running from
the rec center. 52 year old Forbes
refused to tell police who the
young woman was, but sources say
she is a freshman.
"This is outrageous SGA
Legislator Leslie Sikes said. "Still,
as unbelievable as he sometimes is,
we all love him
Members of the executive com-
mittee refused to comment on
Forbes' late night swim. However,
several other sources said that this
is not the first time Forbes has been
caught in the buff.
Grishom said Forbes was caught
skinny dipping in the Tar River on
New Years Eve, but avoided arrest
by smooth talking his way out of
the situation.
"I'll take my clothes off when-
ever I want" Forbes said. "Besides,
it ain't bragging to say, if you've got
it flaunt it
Trustee Baird credited
or controversial idea
fi
Stan K. HOcii
PICKLE PICKER
Officials overturn rule against coed bathrooms
Jones Hall chosen as
site for testing
Bertha Biobutt
EMPP.ESS OF THE liNIVEP.SE
In a recent board meeting, ECU
officials overturned the policy
regarding separate sex bathrooms in
coed residence halls.
"It is a change we have been try-
ing to make for many semesters
now said Larry Boston, faculty
member. "College students arc
adults and should be able to see and
do adult things
Jones Hall will be the testing
grounds for coed bathrooms. If the
change to coed bathrooms goes
over smoothly here, the change will
then go into effect in all coed resi-
dence halls.
"We want to make sure students
are comfortable with the change
Boston said.
According to ECU official Tony
Claw, the change is to make sure
students are aware of their own sex-
uality, or lack thereof.
"It is about time men and
women begin to see the opposite
sex in full nudity so that students
will understand the difference
between genders Claw said. "It
will be quite the educational expe-
rience
Many students are thrilled with
the idea of seeing each other com-
pletely naked.
"I look great in my birthday suit
I can't wait to see everyone else in
theirs said Miya Coleborned,
Jones Hall resident
"The body is a beautiful thing,
especially those of the opposite
sex said Bette
Colingheimerhoffen, Jones Hall
resident. "I just hope people aren't
to shy to drop their drawers in front
of me.
All students interested must
have written consent from their par-
ents before the deadline for on-
campus housing. The change to
coed bathrooms is scheduled to go
into effect Fall 1998. As of March
30, the waiting list to get into Jones
Hall is over four years long.
ECU's Board of Trustees will vote
on a controversial measure that
seeks to legalize prostitution on
campus. If the measure passes,
ECU will become the first educa-
tional institute in the United States
to sanction organized prostitution.
Trustee Richard Baird is credited
with developing the
proposal. He said he
thought of the idea
one day while star-
ing intensely at the
cupola.
"I was out on the
mall, trying to figure
out what the hell
good the cupola is
Bairdexplained. "I
mean it's long, stiff,
thick, fun to look at
but what the hell
good is it? And then,
bam, it came to me.
"Actually, the
idea of legalized
prostitution at
places of learning
is not new. It's a
common practice
on European
campuses, especially in France. By
the way, do you know what they
call a Big Mac in Paris?"
Additionally, Baird is proposing
that current dining facilities be
turned into what he calls "pleasure
domes
"The dining facilities are the
perfect spot students have been
screwed by outrageous prices for
years anyway he said. Baird says
it's also possible that new classes
will be offered to accommodate the
measure, including introduction to
pimping, hoing around (AKA fish-
net finance) and a special seminar
on S & M and T & A sponsored by
BB & T. Surprisingly, the proposal
has met with little opposition on
campus.
When approached for comment
Trustee Benny Coleman, respond-
ed, "Where's my money, honey?"
The measure has drawn fire
from the White House. President
Clinton claims to be enraged and
"spurting" mad.
" A s
Americans, we
owe it to our-
selves not to
pay for sexual
favors
Clinton said.
"No, sex is
something to
be enjoyed
between a
man and his
wife and
women he can
lure into the
Oval Office
Media from
around the
country
have gath-
ered in
Greenville
on the eve of
this historic occasion.
"Smell my finger, roach face
Don Rather is said to have said
while dancing at a downtown
establishment.
A campus waits eagerly.
Trustee Baird envisioned legalizing
prostitution while staring at the cupola.
PHOTO BY SHA NE NE CLEMENTINE
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.
Dean
Smith
takes over
coaching
position
CAapeiHillVetemn
To Continue Legacy At
ECU
John Shaft
PKIVATt Old
ECU Coach Dean Smith
PHOTO BY CHEWtACC
Former UNC-Chapel Hill basket-
ball coach Dean Smith announced
Monday, in a highly emotional
statement that he will replace Joe
Dooley as head basketball coach of
the ECU Pirates. ECU's campus
reacted with shock as rumors that
Smith would end his short-lived
retirement were confirmed.
"I realized there's so much
more I could do for the sport of
basketball Smith told throngs of
reporters '
and pho-
t o g r a -
phers. It's
now time
to turn my
attention
towards
t h e
Pirates
Members
of the
Pirates
were
reportedly
speechless
when they heard the news.
"This is something you dream
of said sophomore Garrett
Blackwelder. "When I was a little
boy, I grew up watching Smith and
Tarheel basketball
Chancellor Eakin flew out to
San Antonio to appear at Smith's
press conference. Smith, a CBS
sports commentator, held the press
conference at the site of the
NCAA national championship
game.
"This is a landmark day in the
history of the Pirates Eakin said.
"Of course, we all have to make
changes to ensure Mr. Smith feefei
comfortable in Greenville, if,
myself, have changed my firstborn
son's name to Dean Smith Eakin
ECU is already rnakingjlJtpajf
rations for the living legend to'
come to Greenville. In a hastily
called meeting, the board of
trustees voted to rename Minges
Coliseum "The Deandome The
new Pirate logo will be stripped
from center court and replaced
with a larger-than-life photo of
Smith.
Ecstatic Pirate fans crowded
outside the Deandome, chanting
"We want Dean" and demanding
to see their hero, not understand-
ing he was in San Antonio.
"Dude, this rocks freshman
BJ Condron said. "I should proba-
bly give back Michael Jordan's jer-
sey now
fl
f
TODAY
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Football season
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1998-99 school
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